Today I'm Thankful For...

Family and friends who go out of their way to be loving and supportive. Not that I have ever forgotten, but I was again reminded over the weekend that I have a truly superb group of family and friends surrounding me at all times. Some live far away, others are close by, but all are irreplaceable, and I'm very fortunate to have them all.

In addition to two very loving parents who are always ready with a pep talk or a swift kick in the ass (whichever I need more at any given time), I am blessed with a sister to whom I've become quite close and who I can consider one of my dearest friends. As my maid of honor for the upcoming wedding, she has been instrumental in helping with all the wedding plans (and for those who have never planned a wedding, trust that there are a LOT of plans). This past weekend she truly outdid herself by planning a fabulous bachelorette party in my honor. Complete with festive drinks, inappropriate edibles, lodging, games, gifts, and all my girls, it was a very welcome respite in an otherwise crappy week.

It was evident how much care, love, and effort went into the party, and for her I'm truly grateful. In addition, I was excited that so many of my closest friends made the effort to attend. From St. Louis, Chicago, Louisville, Lafayette, Bloomington, and Indy, they all made the event special by gathering and sharing the fun with me. So I'm thankful for them, too, because they keep me grounded in the knowledge that I always have someone to lean on should the need arise. I can only hope to provide the same comfort and support in return someday.

There are others who touch my life regularly as well (fiance, grandparents, godparents, in-laws), and they all have a special place and function in my microcosm of existence. I might have my share of struggles, both physical and psychological, these days, but I am never alone, and for that I'm thankful.

Today I'm Thankful For...

So, regular readers of this blog might have noticed that this year has been a particularly challenging one for this girl. Among the numerous should-be-positive stressors (wedding, moving, new job), I've battled some mysterious gastrointestinal ailment (most likely stress and anxiety-induced) for 10 months, lost a bunch of weight, and developed a somewhat-less-than-manageable phobia of important social situations (presumably because I'm constantly worried that I'll ruin the fun or let others down by being sick). Needless to say, it has not been the most carefree and enjoyable year to date, and this week seemed to bring the perfect storm of anxiety and physical revolt, to the point that I actually missed work during portions of 3 separate days.

Realizing that I cannot (or will not) live in a state of fearful apprehension and misery forever, I've taken the only reasonable action steps I could think of, and I scheduled appointments with both a G.I. medical specialist and a stress and anxiety counselor. Those appointments don't happen until next week, unfortunately, so any progress toward some answers and some relief is delayed until then, but in the meantime, I have a different approach to try out.

Independently of one another, both of my parents suggested that I start keeping track of the things that I'm thankful for each day (or at least one thing I can be happy about, even if only briefly). To that end, I will attempt to journal my happy thoughts here, in the hope that elevating my emotional state will also bring physical peace within.

Among other things (namely the incredibly supportive friends and family I'm surrounded by), today I'm thankful for making it through a whole day of work. That may sound trivial and simple, but after this week's struggles to do exactly that, I consider today a victory. For my efforts, I'm rewarded with a weekend during which I can escape the office and the oppressive corporate cubicle culture. The true test will come Monday morning when I wake up and have to do it again, and again the next day, and so on. But I should not get too far ahead of myself. For now, I will take some comfort in the fact that I made it through another 9-hour shift and didn't burn another sick day. I even got some things accomplished while I was there. Good job, Me.

Catching Up

My last post dates back to June 28. It is currently September 13. Even my poor math skills can deduce that it has been too long between posts for this enterprise to constitute a "living" blog. Offering no excuse other than the same overworked-and-underpaid whirlwind of life situation that most twenty-somethings find themselves in, I will simply use this entry to outline the last couple months' worth of lively happenings that have kept me away from my Web journal. In no particular order:

1. Started a new job in April. Not a dream career, and certainly not the most challenging for my overactive neurons, but a much better (and less abusive) environment and scenario for a transition job until a much-anticipated world traveling excursion in 2012.

2. Discovered prime 4th of July fireworks viewing location from own front porch. After pondering for days where to try to watch fireworks from for our first "free" 4th of July together, Gabe and I realized that our front steps were a perfect viewing location for the downtown display. With candles, a radio, and a bottle of wine, we enjoyed a perfect night at our own home (with fireworks, too)!

3. Attended engagement party in Cape Cod. My future in-laws threw us a lovely engagement party in Cape Cod, during which I got to meet as much of the family as possible in one outing. The affair was beautiful, with a pristine day and delightful company...if only we could have stayed longer.

4. Went to college friend's wedding in Arkansas. Because of the aforementioned new job (read: no vacation time), attending a friend's wedding in Arkansas just one week after the engagement party in Cape Cod was a challenge, but one met with enthusiasm and excitement. Gabe and I drove to Arkansas on Friday, celebrated the wedding festivities on Saturday, and drove back home on Sunday. It was brief but so much fun to connect with all the college girls again. Absolutely worth the trek.

5. Painted a whole house in one weekend. There was no rest for the weary, as the weekend after the wedding in Arkansas saw us washing, sanding, and painting a house that we were planning to move into the following week (yes, you read correctly that we had 4 straight weekends of major events/tasks/physical exertions). It was my idea/desire to paint the walls, as I could not stand the thought of another couple years in a beige and yellow residence. While I am so happy to have color on the walls of our new home, I will not soon forget how much work it is to paint more than one room at a time. 2.5 days and 37 solid working hours later, we had painted the last wall and could finally "relax."

6. "Relaxed" by moving into a new house. Following the painting project, we promptly moved from our downtown condo to a more suburban (but still lively) neighborhood. Our new digs come complete with a real yard, access to a local fitness path, AND the opportunity to get a pet. One of the primary reasons for the move was to enable the pet-getting venture, so our future will soon include a furry friend.

7. Planned the remainder of our upcoming wedding. Actually, this hasn't happened just yet, but it is absolutely the next major thing that needs to get done in our crazy lives. If we don't get on it, our wedding will have great attire, photos, and food, but it will lack an actual ceremony due to not having an officiant, as well as be devoid of flowers, cake, transportation, and invites. Perhaps I should make myself a countdown calendar so that I get scared into being motivated to finish up the details...

While there are countless other activities that have kept me busy the last few months, I think I've hit the highlights above. Here's hoping for a slower pace soon. I won't hold my breath.

Local Celebrities...Sorta

Check us out (photo #9)! During the recent Brew Ha-Ha event in downtown Indy, my sister and I were captured by the MetroMix paparazzi. It was a beautiful day (albeit really HOT), and we enjoyed good beer and good friends. Hooray summertime!

TV Time

As a means of keeping myself (somewhat) sane during the past few months, I have taken to using the regular schedule of weekly television shows to stay motivated for each new day. There is something comforting about the anticipation of each night's indulgent TV lineup. While I realize that I should probably be spending my time more productively doing things like looking for housing or planning our upcoming wedding, I find that I am much better at procrastinating by getting lost in TV Land (and not the Nick At Nite one, either). In no particular order, the shows I love (and that you should be watching if you are not already) include the following:

The Office - I just can't get enough of this show. Now that it is syndicated, I can watch it at 5:30, 7:30, and 11 p.m. every night. On Tuesdays, TBS has an Office marathon from 8-11 p.m. New episodes air Thursdays at 9 p.m. on NBC. I have seen every single episode, some 4 or 5 times, but I still watch The Office any chance I get. It is said that humor always has an ounce of truth in it, and The Office is a perfect example of that rule. And dare I say, not just an ounce of truth. In one way or another, The Office is every job I have ever had that takes place in corporate America. And while not all real-life days are as funny as those on The Office, remembering to find the humor in the mundane makes each day that much more bearable.

30 Rock - I have only recently discovered how much this show rocks (pun intended). If I didn't have a marked aversion to New York City and New Yorkers, I think I would want this show to be my life. I feel like I know a real person who is just like each of the quirky characters. While our medium was slightly different, my former coworker "family" experienced a similar insanity that was almost always hilarious. It was also frenetic, sometimes completely insane, and borderline out of control at all times, but the people made each unpredictable day worth it.

Glee - This one is a guilty pleasure of mine. As a music geek, I truly enjoy the over-the-top musical numbers that spontaneously break out in the middle of the high-school dramedy. Beyond the good tunes, I am impressed by the charming cast and the chemistry they all share, even amidst the ridiculous plot twists and hijinks of a predictably delightful upper of a show. Glee is aptly named, as I always feel happier after watching it.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia - This show is also a guilty pleasure, but of a totally different breed than Glee. Always Sunny is completely obscene and irreverent, with a dark humor that I normally don't enjoy. What makes this show so entertaining, however, is the cast that keeps things light even amidst some heavy-handed wit. This show is very intelligent and brash, but also subtle as it grows on you episode after episode. It is an acquired taste, but a very palatable one because of its cynical honesty.

Burn Notice - There are a lot of imitations of this show, but Burn Notice is by far the best of the lot. The trio of key actors makes a fantastic team with fabulous on-screen chemistry. This show has a little bit of everything: mystery, super-spy intrigue, romance, humor, action and blow-'em-up special effects, intelligent and interesting writing, and lovely eye candy for all. Burn Notice is suspenseful but not scary, intense but not gory, and overwhelmingly entertaining. I look forward to it every week.

True Blood - This show is not for the faint of heart. A stark contrast to the previous selections, True Blood is heavy and dark, but captivating at the same time. While I have never been one to particularly enjoy vampire lore, the treatment of the subject matter in True Blood is so well done that I usually forget how fantastical the whole production is. The acting in this show is very good, and the visual appeal is immediately noticeable. With loveable characters, an overarching sensuality, and powerful, captivating plots, True Blood is worth the price of having HBO, but it's definitely not for kids.

Big Bang Theory - What can I say? I like a good nerd, and this show has lots of them. The characters in this show remind me of my beloved childhood and high school friends, all of whom were impossibly intelligent but equally socially awkward. I like to think this show makes me slightly smarter because of the high-level subject matter, but really I just like to laugh at Sheldon's neuroses.

Fringe - Fringe is another cerebral show, intended to stretch the limits of what our minds perceive possible. While most of the "science" is not overly believable by today's standards, the scenarios that the writers think up are challenging to ponder, and the characters in this show are extremely lovable. The father figure, Walter, is superb as the mad scientist, and Peter (played by Joshua Jackson) is the bad-boy-gone-good that every girl secretly wants deep down. Some folks may not be able to accept the premise of this show, and for them it would likely not be enjoyable, but for those who can go with the "fringe" concept, it is definitely worth watching.

Friday Night Lights - Here's a show that is based on a movie that is based on a book. Even with the potential to be watered down from the original (real-life) story, this show manages to capture the essence of the small-town Texas high-school football drama. The show competently takes on a lot of difficult subject matter while maintaining a fully-wholesome product. While the show only has another season and a half left, I am pleased with NBC's decision to actually finish the show and bring the stories to a close. I'll be watching to see how it all turns out.

Bonus: Last Comic Standing - Because it's funny. Seriously funny.

Spring Fever

Anyone who reads this blog regularly (and by regularly, I mean every few months when I get around to writing...I will write more frequently one of these weeks, I swear) knows that I wrote an entry last year about how much I enjoy Fall. The smells, the leaves, the freshness of the air. That still holds true...I do love Fall. But after a particularly unpleasant (and noticeably depressing) Winter, I have a renewed appreciation for the glory of a beautiful Spring.

There is something almost tangible about the way that Spring brightens the spirit and refreshes one's outlook. Not only does Spring melt the Winter snow, giving way to lush greenery and a rainbow of flowering plants, but it also thaws the soul and replenishes hope. In what seems like a brief wink, the world emerges from the cold, barren Winter in a glorious bloom.

And the sun! Perhaps the best part of Spring, above all other positive qualities, is that Spring signals the return of the sun to this part of the world. Winter is not just cold, but mostly dark, gray, and rather gloomy in Indiana. The Spring sunshine breaks through the gloom and has a very calming, yet energizing, effect on all who can catch a few rays while basking in the perfect weather. People go back to spending time outside, meeting friends for drinks on a brew pub patio, walking their dogs with renewed vigor, or taking a long run around the neighborhood.

The world feels alive again, and after a rough few months between the holidays and now, I am more than enthused about the new season and a fresh start for this year. While it will likely take awhile to completely shake off the lingering ailments of the Winter (both physical and psychological), I can't think of a better environment in which to work through the healing process. Hooray for Spring!

March Madness

It's no secret that of all the college sports out there, football is my favorite. I like the game, the passion of the players, the season in which the sport is played. I love everything about college football except the debacle that presently defines the "postseason." While the regular season of college football is intense and exciting every single week, the "championship" is a let down, and quite frankly, a waste of time. Because there is no playoff system in college football, there is never a true national champion, but merely a winner of an arbitrary final matchup between two teams selected subjectively by a committee of observers. Not exactly a stellar demonstration of the true essence of sport: deciding a winner and a loser via head-to-head competition.

Contrast college football's postseason woes with the shining example of a true national championship contest in college basketball, and you begin to understand the magic of what college hoops fans call "March Madness." (Even though this blog is not a revenue-producing publication, I should make note of the fact that "March Madness" is a registered trademark of the NCAA, and I don't actually have any rights to use it. Not that I could afford the rights fee, so I'm going to use it anyway. I digress...) The few weeks in late March leading up to the Division 1 Men's Basketball Championship are some of the most exciting in all of college sports, and the TV money collected during this tournament alone is nearly enough to keep the entirety of the NCAA and its programs funded for the whole year.

What makes this style of championship competition so great is that it requires teams to prove their worth both during the regular season (in order to get invited to the postseason tournament), as well as on the court during the championship single-elimination tournament. "Little" teams get the opportunity to be matched up with "big" teams, and for the most part, the tournament becomes any team's championship to win. The college football mentality that only BCS-conference schools are important enough to play for a national championship does not exist in college basketball. If your team makes it into the 64-team championship bracket, it has a chance (even if only a small one) to play for a true national championship.

Here's hoping the NCAA men's basketball committee recognizes what a good thing it has going and leaves well enough alone for sports fans to enjoy each Spring for years to come. Perhaps the college football powers-that-be could learn a thing or two from their basketball counterparts...I won't hold my breath.

Sunday Night Contemplation: The Climb

It has been a really long time since my last entry, and there are a number of reasons for my failure to write. The most immediate reason I've been silent lately is that I've been in pure survival mode, just trying to outlast each oppressive day at my current job. My stress level has been high, my mental (and often physical) health has been questionable at best, and I simply haven't had the time or energy to devote much effort to my own goals and activities (which include my neglected blog). Another reason that I've not written much lately is that I haven't been inspired to write anything suitable for a publication that both current and potential employers might read, so I've kept my mouth shut so as not to upset the delicate balance of my daily life in this new year.

I was inspired, however, on the way home from a restful getaway weekend today, to write about the journey on which I find myself currently. While rolling back into town this afternoon, I heard a familiar, but this time more poignant, song on the radio. While I don't make a habit of internalizing Miley Cyrus tunes, "The Climb" speaks to my current dissatisfaction with my professional situation, and the lyrics could be a current anthem for my daily struggle.

It is an interesting and challenging period of life in which I find myself. A dichotomy of emotions and experiences, I am overwhelmingly happy with my personal life that includes my amazing fiance, the most wonderful family, and a core of irreplaceable friends, while at the same time being completely drained and dejected by an unhealthy work environment that I despise, at a job that brings me no closer to my long-term professional goals. My experience is such a contradiction that I often feel as if I'm only observing my life and not actually living it. My desperation to find a fulfilling contribution to the world and my life leaves me feeling unsettled and impatient.

What keeps me going every day are the constant reminders that I am fortunate to have my health (stress-induced ailments aside), my intelligence, and my incredibly supportive loved ones. Like my mom is so fond of reiterating, "This, too, shall pass." What I need to get better at is keeping my goals in sight and focusing on the things in life that I can actually control: my attitude, my motivation to improve the current situation, and my attention to the lessons I can learn from the struggles I endure now and in the future. As "The Climb" so aptly observes, there will always be challenges to overcome, and it is how we approach the difficult journeys that truly determines whether or not we find fulfillment. Life is not about end results, but rather how we spend our fleeting time and what we do with our opportunities. In short, all that really matters is The Climb.

Here's to putting one foot in front of the other...

Super Bowl Sunday: Indianapolis vs. New Orleans

GO COLTS!

Tuesday Tunes: Bobby McFerrin

Apologies for missing a Tuesday Tunes entry last week. It was a ridiculously busy week at work, and I completely forgot to write. This week, I was determined to write, and I had to select a song that is not currently one of my anthems, but it may need to become my primary anthem. Since November, I have been battling periodic bouts of some mysterious bug that makes me feel ill for a few days at a time at approximately month intervals. I've been to doctors, and I've taken meds for an infection which has since cleared up (supposedly). Yet, I continue to have symptoms pop up with no warning. For someone who hasn't been sick this many times in 3 months in her entire life, it's been a bit of a shock to my system and my lifestyle. Just when I start to feel better, I'm pulled back down by this mysterious ailment, and frankly, my psyche is starting to show a little wear and tear from the stress of not knowing how I will feel from one day to the next. In order to help combat the mental anguish, I have decided to keep Bobby McFerrin's "Don't Worry, Be Happy" in my head as often as possible. If you listen to this, you'll understand that my goal should not be overly difficult, as once you've heard the song, you usually can't get it out of your head for days anyway.

If anyone out there has other ideas for how to keep my spirits up and mind off feeling awful, I will accept them gladly.

Let's all keep the cheer level high and hope that Spring gets here soon!

Tuesday Tunes: Pants On The Ground

Because I'm tired, and because Mr. Larry Platt has (unfortunately?) become an overnight hit due to his debut and exposure last week on American Idol, I have only this to share this week. Enjoy a good chuckle...Happy Tuesday!

Tuesday Tunes: American Idol - Season 9

Whether you are a fan or not, you can't deny the immense gravitational pull of popularity that the American Idol phenomenon has on this country. For better or worse, the show begins a new chapter tonight as Season 9 commences with audition episodes guaranteed to give viewers hope for true talent, as well as numerous laughs at the all-comer circus that American Idol auditions have become. I, personally, am a fan of the show, as I like to listen to the true singers grow and learn with each new week's challenging repertoire. I also appreciate that Idol brings its particular brand of high-energy, feel-good fun to the masses during quite possibly the most dreadful few months of the year (at least for those of us who live where it snows a lot and the sun doesn't shine for weeks at a time).

It will be interesting to see how Ellen DeGeneres does as a replacement judge for long-time Idol darling Paula Abdul. Coupled with the news of Simon Cowell's impending departure from American Idol, the new judging panel could cause this season to be the best or the worst of them all, depending on how participants, creators, and fans alike react to the changes. I am intrigued by the new dynamic and look forward to tonight's premiere. Check it out on FOX, 8 p.m. ET.

Tuesday Tunes: Jo Dee Messina

Two reasons for this week's tune, "It Gets Better:"

1. I was recently reminded by a friend who is battling cancer that positive thinking and internal strength are the best ways to combat challenging situations.

2. I always seem to find myself in a bit of a mid-winter funk come January and February, and I needed a pick-me-up from the cold, permanently cloudy weather that causes my seasonal depression.

This song acts as one of my many anthems, primarily because of the honest, powerful lyrics. The overall message echoes the idea that whether things in life are good or bad, if you keep moving forward, they will likely change. Nothing is as good or as bad it it seems at first glance, and the key to a fulfilling life is learning to enjoy riding the waves.

Take a listen here. The song says it all.